A Slug In The Lug
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Robert James Parfett
Henry Ard lived with his father in a town called Eering.
And everyone who knew him found the little boy endearing.
His rosy cheeks and pleasant words, his cute blond curly locks,
The way he wore his trousers neatly tucked into his socks.
He grinned at every passer-by with such a sunny smile,
But one thing played on Henry's mind and bugged him all the while.
School for Henry was a hoot and everything was easy.
Everything except for Math's class, that made him feel queasy.
The happy vibe and smiley face soon disappeared from sight.
As Henry walked towards the classroom with a look of fright.
Mr. McMangle sat there waiting, fingers gently tapping.
His small bald head shone in the light, and Henry started flapping.
"Come in quickly all of you! We have no time to lose.
I'm pleased to say this afternoon I have some splendid news.
I know you all love fractions so today you have a test.
The questions are quite difficult, but you must do your best.
Henry Ard I hope you heard me, let's hope you're awake!
And please read the instructions just for once for goodness sake!"
Sweat appeared on Henry's brow, his heart began to thump.
Why did old McMangle always make him feel a chump?
Math's and Henry weren't the best of friends, a fact's a fact.
But surely that was no excuse for him to be attacked.
It didn't matter what he did and how much Henry tried.
McMangle didn't like him, there was nowhere he could hide.
"The test will take about an hour so you had better start.
Henry did you hear me? You're in Math's you know, not Art!
Put your pens and coloured pencils right out of the way.
Did you hear me Henry Ard? We haven't got all day!
And everybody please remember, don't forget the date.
Underline in colour and make sure the lines are straight!"
Poor Henry now seemed quite confused and slowly raised a hand.
"Excuse me Sir did you say colour? I don't understand."
Mean Mr. McMangle's face began to look quite smug.
"Henry didn't hear me! There's a slug stuck in your lug!
Have you got a slug in your lug?" McMangle started jeering.
Or maybe it's because you are a little Ard of Eering!!!"
Henry drew a long deep breath then raised his head and smiled.
"Sorry Sir, you are quite right, I'm such a silly child!
As you say, I obviously have a slug invasion.
But hopefully the slugs can help me finish this equation."
Henry looked down at his work awaiting a reaction.
McMangle stared and calmly spoke. "You have an extra fraction!"
He finished off the question and felt happy with his work.
His hand went up with confidence, but then he saw a smirk.
McMangle took his paper from him and he started reading.
"It seems the slugs can't do math's either, maybe they need feeding!"
Henry heard the bell and slowly stood up from his chair.
"Just you wait!" he muttered, "I will teach you to be fair!"
The next day Henry woke up early, "What a lovely day!
It's perfect weather for a walk, I think I'll go and play."
As Henry skipped along the path he noticed lots of trails
Which glistened in the morning sun, he guessed they must be snails.
But then he saw the slimy slugs, his brain began to tick.
"I've just had a cunning plan. Now, which one shall I pick?"
When Henry got to school that morning far from being scared
He felt a sense of great excitement as he got prepared.
McMangle marched into the class a frown fixed on his face.
"I thought your marks would be quite high, but that is not the case.
He turned to look at Henry with his usual mocking grin.
And everybody noticed something crawling on his chin.
The slimy slug travelled fast towards the open hole
It overcame the mean moustache and reached its final goal.
McMangle spluttered then he choked. It seemed the end was near.
When suddenly the startled slug began to reappear.
"Have you got a slug in your lug?" Henry cruelly beamed.
A terrified McMangle felt his ear then screamed and screamed.
Math's class ever since has been a pleasure to attend.
Henry has much better marks and worships Mrs. Friend.
No one knows exactly where McMangle is right now.
Some say he's the owner of a factory in Slough
That manufactures slug pellets, a million every day!
To make sure not a single slug will ever come his way.
The Not So Wise Owl|
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Robert is an English language teacher and father of two boys, his stories are aimed at 4 to 7 year olds, the education age group he knows best.
Robert writes with rhyme which stimulates children's sense of humour and fun, making learning more enjoyable.
Robert's two boys are his strongest supporters and critics!
Here's a list of just some of Robert's stories which are rotated on this page one at a time and available to registered readers. The entire collection is available immediately to those registered for Unlimited Children's Stories (see Free Story Access above).
Not Now Nessie
The Medicine Man
Frogs just Want to Have Fun
The Clockwork Chameleon
Kung Fu Cat
Colin and the Carrot
Percival the Polite Python
The Fidgety Pharaoh
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